With Week 13 having come and gone in the NFL season, everyone is officially at the three-quarter pole, having played 12 games this season. The season is coming into focus as we now know the contenders, the pretenders, and the flat-out awful teams. I’ll be handing out grades to each team for their third-quarter performance, not their year-long accomplishments. So expect lower-than-expected grades for the Steelers and Ravens, but higher-than-expected grades for the Jaguars and Titans. Just a hint.
Dallas Cowboys (8-4): An uneven quarter for the Cowboys. They won two games, sure; but did they really inspire any confidence in you? The 7-6 stinkbomb against the Redskins was sleep-inducing, the pantsing at the hands of Green Bay was discouraging, and their inability to slow down a formerly punchless Giants attack was worrisome. In the grand scheme of things, they’re 8-4 and probably headed for the playoffs. But if they lose in the first round (again), does it really matter? Grade: B-
Philadelphia Eagles (8-4): Now that the third quarter is over, we can wipe that nasty loss to the Raiders off the slate before assessing them. I think they had a pretty good four-week stretch. Winning three games, the Eagles won two road games and took care of division foe Washington at home. That’ll play. Now that they’ve nestled themselves in the thick of the playoff race, we can see what they have in store for us to close out the season. They’re traditionally good closers, so don’t expect a drop-off between now and Week 17. Grade: B+
New York Giants (7-5): The Giants have followed their four-game losing streak with a 2-1 record. But I’m still not sold. Denver ate them for Thanksgiving dinner, and the overtime win against Atlanta didn’t exactly impress anyone. However, wins are wins, and their defeat of Dallas keeps them firmly in the playoff, and division, hunt. I just need to see more consistency before I get too excited about these guys. Grade: C+
Washington Redskins (3-9): Is there such a thing as an encouraging 1-3 quarter? If so, the Redskins are the perfect example. After beating Denver, Washington lost to Dallas by one, Philly by three, and New Orleans by three in overtime. An argument could be made that they should’ve won each of those games. Obviously they didn’t, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t impressed by the way this team has performed over the last few weeks. Maybe Coach Jim Zorn hasn’t lost them yet after all. Grade: C+
Minnesota Vikings (10-2): In case you were wondering, the Vikes have exactly two wins over teams with a winning record. Actually, make that “team”, because they’ve beaten Green Bay twice. That’s it. They played the Cardinals in an attempt to add to that list and were thoroughly outplayed. I’m not yet sold on the Vikings because, honestly, they’ve played four games against decent opponents and are 2-2 in those games. We’ll see what Old Man Favre has in store for the last quarter of the season; their fate rests on his arm whether they want to admit it or not. Grade: B
Green Bay Packers (8-4): Last quarter, I chastised the Packers for losing to the Buccaneers and not doing enough to get themselves back in the playoff race. Well, either they read what I wrote and got inspired, or they just played up to their talent level. Either way, THAT is how you go through a quarter. The slate wasn’t the toughest it could have been, but beating Dallas, San Francisco, and Baltimore is nothing to sneeze at either. Aaron Rodgers has been tremendous this season, despite being under constant pressure, and is the main reason that the Pack are still alive in the NFC playoff race. Well, him and Charles Woodson, that is. Dude’s a beast. Grade: A-
Chicago Bears (5-7): Things have gone from bad to worse in Chicago this quarter. The lifeless loss at San Francisco in which Jay Cutler threw 31 interceptions was just the beginning. Philadelphia and Minnesota kept the losing streak going, and only a date with the St. Louis Rams could heal the pain. And even that game was entirely too close. This team is a train wreck right now and I don’t see any way it gets better with Green Bay, Baltimore, and Minnesota coming up next. Grade: F
Detroit Lions (2-10): I’m going to (essentially, but with some updates) repeat what I said last time, because I still feel the same way: “Uhhh, well, hmmm. I don’t expect much from the Lions, but they aren’t exactly meeting my expectations. They beat the Brownies, which was great; but then they turn around and look terrible against Green Bay and Cincinnati. I know, I know, Matthew Stafford was hurt, but he wasn’t all that good in his Thanksgiving date with the Packers (4 INTs). Detroit, I love you, but we need some time apart right now.” Grade: D
New Orleans Saints (12-0): These guys sure do love to play with fire. Will they get burned? I think so, eventually, but for the time being, they’ve been great. The near-brushes with St. Louis and Washington aren’t exactly comforting, but wins are wins at this point. 12-0 is 12-0 and the New England thrashing was particularly memorable, despite the Patriots’ struggles this season. The thing about this team is that they’re never out of a game. I watched them look terrible all day against the ‘Skins and then turn it on at the end to score the requisite points to win. That quick-strike offense just can’t be counted out. Ever. Grade: A-
Atlanta Falcons (6-6): A 1-3 quarter, with the only win being a last-second job against Tampa Bay? I know Matt Ryan is hurt, but come on guys. The reality of the situation is that this is a banged-up team that wasn’t particularly good to begin with. They’ll continue to struggle until they get their pieces back…if they ever do. 8-8 sounds about right for this squad. Maybe 9-7 if they get a couple breaks along the way. Grade: C-
Carolina Panthers (5-7): To recap the Cats’ roller coaster of a quarter, I asked their number one fan, Skip, for his thoughts: “We were given an opportunity to save our season with 3 out of 4 at home against beatable teams. Lotta pride against ATL, but a miserable game plan against the Fish shot the season after failing to get to .500 for the 4th time this year. The Jets were a hangover disaster and Jake’s swan song, leading us into the uncharted waters of the Matt Moore era.” That, my friends, is why I go to him for these things. Grade: D
Tampa Bay Buccaneers (1-11): A couple of close losses this quarter for the Bucs. Not that it’s any consolation for a fan base that realizes its coach is in completely over his head, but there have been some recent improvements. Josh Freeman is erratic, but does show some promise in the pocket. He’s definitely a guy to build the offense around in the future. He’s about the only one, though. There just isn’t much talent in Tampa right now and it has shown in the past four weeks. Grade: C-
Arizona Cardinals (8-4): The Cards liked only losing one game last quarter so much that they decided to repeat the feat this quarter. Going 3-1 with wins against Seattle, St. Louis, and Minnesota, Arizona didn’t exactly take down murderers’ row, but they won the games they were supposed to. If every other team in the league could do such a thing, we wouldn’t be subjected to so many average teams with 5-7, 6-6, and 7-5 records. Parity? Yeah right, try ‘mediocrity’. Sorry, I had to get that off my chest real quick. I feel better now. Grade: A-
San Francisco 49ers (5-7): I read something the other day that said something to the effect of, “once San Francisco got away from its dull, predictable running game plans and put the ball in Alex Smith’s hands, their fortunes have turned.” This is what frustrates me about young players (especially quarterbacks). They’re expected to perform at a high level right off the getty, so any time they don’t, they’re not given ample opportunity to showcase their abilities. Everybody knew that Alex Smith was a gifted player and had the work ethic of a well-digger. His only problem was that he was forced to grow up on the job and didn’t have any talent around him. Now that he’s gotten a few years under his belt, he been productive and has made the Niners a lot better than they would’ve been with Shaun Hill at quarterback handing the ball off to Frank Gore 35 times per game. Vernon Davis’ career has been revitalized and Michael Crabtree has been great since he finally signed with the team. All because of Alex Smith getting an honest chance to prove that he could play. Imagine that. Grade: C+
Seattle Seahawks (5-7): Status quo for Seattle. Beat the teams you should (St. Louis and San Francisco) and lose to the teams you should (Arizona and Minnesota). I can’t help but thing the lingering effects of Matt Hasselbeck’s broken ribs are affecting this team’s consistency. If he isn’t hit, they play well; but once he’s tagged a couple times and his ribs begin to act up, they might as well be playing with Seneca Wallace at quarterback. No, that’s not a good thing. They might as well tank the season and get a Top 10 pick at this point. Oklahoma State’s Russell Okung would love to play left tackle for you for the next decade, I bet. Grade: C
St. Louis Rams (1-11): Four more losses this quarter, but none of them was by more than ten points. This group is improving, but there just isn’t enough talent there to compete. A big shout out to Steven Jackson, though. The guy is the only good player on that offense, yet nobody can stop him even though they know he’s getting the ball an inordinate amount of times each game. He’s impressive to watch; he really is. Grade: C
New England Patriots (7-5): Before we get started, I just want to repeat what I said last time: “Everybody has wood now that the Pats are 6-2 and Tom Brady is flinging the football around again. Their three-game win streak (after losing to Denver) has come against Tennessee, Tampa Bay, and Miami. Wow. Yes, I’m skeptical, because their defense still looks a step slow and the offense isn’t as efficient as people are making it out to be. With Indy and New Orleans coming up shortly, we’ll know more about New England soon. For now, I think they’re ok.” Fast forward to now, and we have a 7-5 team that was unable to beat Indianapolis or New Orleans. No shame in that, but when you consider yourself one of the big boys, you have to beat one of the other big boys to get some credibility. Can we just keep it real? This isn’t a very good team right now. Grade: D
New York Jets (6-6): They’ve put the training wheels back on Mark Sanchez, and it appears to have worked. Kind of. Sanchez still makes some silly decisions, but by limiting what he does each game, the mistakes aren’t as killer as they once were. The back-to-back wins against Carolina and Buffalo have given them some momentum, but the playoffs are pretty much out of the question unless they can somehow scrape to 9 wins and hope for a divisional collapse from everyone else. Basically, it’s not happening. Grade: B-
Miami Dolphins (6-6): You almost did it, Miami. You were a choke job against Buffalo away from being undefeated this quarter and in the driver’s seat in the AFC East. Instead, you’ll have to settle for an outside shot at the division title. The win against New England was huge, but it does no good if you guys go out and lay an egg against Jacksonville or Tennessee in the next couple weeks. Chad Henne looks strong, but can he make enough plays to get you over the hump? I guess we’ll see. Grade: B+
Buffalo Bills (4-8): I’ll admit it: I know nothing about this team. I know that Ryan Fitzpatrick is now playing quarterback, Terrell Owens has put together a couple of good games, and they fired Dick Jauron. Otherwise? Not much. They’re never on TV, their highlights on SportsCenter last about 17 seconds, and I don’t get much of a feel for them. They went 1-3 last quarter and are now 4-8 overall. I do know that that isn’t very good. Grade: D
Cincinnati Bengals (9-3): Not that a 3-1 quarter is anything to sneeze at, but when that one loss came against Oakland, it’s a little unsettling, right? Regardless, the Bengals have shown everyone that they’re not an early season fluke and that their defense is among the best in football. Carson Palmer (despite the interceptions) is making enough plays to make the offense dangerous and the return of Cedric Benson from a hip injury means that they have their workhorse back. That being said, I’d love to play these guys in the playoffs. No disrespect, but they don’t have the ability to run away and hide from teams, nor are they built for a huge comeback. Basically, if you get up on them early, you’re going to win. Grade: A-
Pittsburgh Steelers (6-6): Let’s see: an 0-4 quarter, a WR/QB tiff, their best player on defense is likely done for the year, and their coach is now threatening to make roster changes. Well, it appears that the Steelers haven’t really enjoyed the last month, now doesn’t it? I know everybody’s piling onto him for it now, but you have to admit that Coach Mike Tomlin saying that his team would “unleash hell in December” was a pretty legit move. I’d be jacked if Jim Caldwell came out and said that. Mainly because it’d mean that he’s not thinking about benching our best players for the final game when that strategy has yielded absolutely no results in the past 5 years. Wait, how did I get on the Colts? We’ll get to them in a minute... Grade: F
Baltimore Ravens (6-6): After beginning the season 3-0, the Ravens dropped 3 in a row to get to 3-3. Now they’ve alternated wins and losses for the past 6 weeks to bring them to a total record of 6-6. Hey, at least this team’s consistent, right? Of their six losses, only last week’s defeat at the hands of Green Bay was by more than 10 points. They stay in games, they just don’t close very well. And that, my friends, is why they won’t make the playoffs. Grade: D
Cleveland Browns (1-11): Remember what I said earlier about San Francisco and Alex Smith? Well it’s happening in Cleveland as well with Brady Quinn. The kid has shown a ton of potential and is finally relaying some of that into success on the field. The only problem is that his teammates (save for Joe Thomas) aren’t very good, so the win/loss results won’t be there for him. Cleveland is already talking about drafting another quarterback. Really? You have one of the best prospects of the past decade under your nose and you want to start over with another daisy-fresh rookie? There are reasons why Cleveland is Cleveland. I’m still holding out hope that Quinn gets traded to Denver this offseason and flourishes under the tutelage of Josh McDaniels. Stay tuned. Grade: F
Indianapolis Colts (12-0): As I was saying earlier (see: Pittsburgh Steelers), Indianapolis head coach Jim Caldwell has already said that he’s going to rest his players in the final weeks much like his predecessor, Tony Dungy, did during his time in Indy. This doesn’t make sense. We rested our players in 2005, 2007, and 2008 and lost in the first round. We were forced to play all of our guys in 2006 for the duration of the season and went on a four-game winning streak to win the Super Bowl. What about that makes anyone want to bench the starters in this season’s finale against Buffalo? Two weeks off doesn’t make you fresh, it makes you rusty. How do I know? BECAUSE I’VE SEEN THE COLTS IN THE PLAYOFFS FOR THE PAST 5 YEARS. Sorry I went all caps on you, but I’m getting flustered already. As for the last quarter? The Colts went 4-0 with wins over the Patriots, Ravens, Texans, and Titans. Not bad, boys; not bad at all. Grade: A
Houston Texans (5-7): Wow, this went from “eh, not bad” to “holy crap, this sucks” in a few short weeks. They haven’t won since November 1st and are now facing another mediocre season. They’re the Texans, so they’ll probably go 8-8, but it’s just stunning how this team is unable to achieve any sustained success whatsoever. I can’t figure it out; I honestly can’t. Now Steve Slaton is out for the season and George H.W. Bush is threatening to boycott their games until they wear their monochrome red jerseys again. Ok, so only one of those things is actually true. Grade: F
Jacksonville Jaguars (7-5): Interesting fact about the Jags this year: they’ve only played three teams that currently have a .500-or-better record. One of them was the Jets, who they beat this quarter, but they lost the other two. I guess what I’m trying to say is that, yes, Jacksonville is 7-5, but they haven’t beaten a single good team all season. With Miami, New England, and Indianapolis coming up, we’ll know a lot more about the Jaguars’ true identity by the New Year holiday. Personally, I’m not a believer, but I’ll give them a chance to convince me otherwise. I’ll see you Thursday, December 17th, Jaguars. Show me something. Grade: B-
Tennessee Titans (5-7): The comeback win over the Cardinals was miraculous, but the missed opportunities at Indianapolis are probably going to come back to haunt the Titans. At 6-6, they could’ve possibly made the playoffs. At 5-7, they’re dead. Vince Young has been very, very good over the past few weeks, and the future is bright in Nashville with him and the electric Chris Johnson leading the way. They still need a dependable receiver, but there are signs of life from this offense outside of Johnson’s long runs. Grade: B-
Denver Broncos (8-4): I like when the Broncos win; it puts Big Brother in such a better mood. Dude gets grumpy when his teams are losing (who doesn’t?), and grumpy Big Brother isn’t exactly a joy to be around. So, with that in mind, I’d like to personally thank Josh McDaniels and his squad for taking care of business lately. Sure, the losses to San Diego and Washington were maddening, but they’ve responded nicely with convincing wins over the Giants and Chiefs. Denver isn’t who we thought they were at the beginning of the year; nor who we thought they were when they were 6-0. But they’re a pretty good team that could be tricky to face in the playoffs if you have to go on the road to face them. For the record, I still think they should trade for Brady Quinn this offseason. Grade: B-
San Diego Chargers (9-3): Suddenly dangerous, the Chargers have been dumptrucking people this quarter. After thrashing the Broncos and Chiefs, San Diego leads the AFC West and is threatening Cincy for the second seed in the conference. Philip Rivers has been terrific, Antonio Gates is having a great year, and LaDainian Tomlinson even gains yards every now and then. Hosting the Bengals in two weeks, the Chargers can make a statement that they’re a team to be reckoned with in the AFC…if they haven’t done so already. Grade: A
Oakland Raiders (4-8): Now that was a productive quarter for the Silver and Black. Beating the 9-3 Bengals and the defending champion Steelers in Pittsburgh shows what Oakland can do when they get steady quarterback play. Bruce Gradkowski has emerged as a playmaker for the offense and his play may relegate JaMarcus Russell to the bench until he develops a work ethic or a desire to actually play football. Either would be nice, both would be a pipedream. Grade: B+
Kansas City Chiefs (3-9): I know they went 2-2 this quarter, but my goodness the Chiefs are bad. Matt Cassel hasn’t earned any of his $50 million dollar contract this season (but honestly, does that surprise anyone? Anyone?) and the team hasn’t really gotten much better. Jamaal Charles looks good in the backfield and the defense is ok, but there is nothing for this team to hang their hat on right now. At least their mascot, KC Wolf, is awesome. They play Buffalo and Cleveland in the coming weeks. Yuck. Grade: D+
~~ Lank
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