In case you haven't heard, Lamar Odom is marrying Khloe Kardashian this weekend. I'm all for true love and holy matrimony and all that, but I can't say that I support anything about this decision on Lamar's behalf. Why? Well, I've decided to make it easier on you, my valued reader, to follow along in my thought process by separating my points, thus making them easier to digest. Here we go...
1.) It's Khloe Kardashian -- not Kim: Kim Kardashian is a good-looking woman. Yeah, she's kinda trashy and doesn't have much going on upstairs, but at least when she walks down the street, fellas do double-takes. Khloe? Not so much. She's had weight problems, complains about not getting as much attention as her sisters, and just isn't very attractive. Do you really want that forever, Lamar?
2.) You're Lamar Odom: Look, you play for the Lakers, you're a good-looking guy, you just signed a multi-million dollar extension to stay in L.A., and you've never had any legal troubles. Basically, you can have your pick of the litter when it comes to Southern California females. Hugh Hefner has been making a living off of being rich and famous in SoCal for years, at least pretend like you have one-hundredth of his swag.
3.) She used to date Rashad McCants: Nothing against the former Tar Heel, Timberwolve, and King, but he's not exactly an All-Star. As a matter of fact, he's not even signed to a team right now and he's only (almost) 25 years old. You can't go out like that, Lamar. Taking a girl who got cheated on by a guy who isn't even in the League right now? You just won a championship, man; you could do a lot better than a guy who's a sixth man, at best.
4.) You have two children: From all accounts, Lamar, you're a good father. What makes you think that Khloe is the type of woman that you need to help raise your kids? From what I've seen of her (and admittedly, that's not a whole lot) she seems immature, whiny, and needy. Your kids are supposed to be that way, not the woman you choose to raise them with.
5.) The drama potential is too high: The way she handles her self on Keeping Up With the Kardashians leads me to believe she's a drama queen. Lamar, you don't need that. You have a career and a new extension with the Lakers to think about. How are you supposed to concentrate on winning championships when you're wife is complaining about how her sister gets more attention from magazines than she does? Do you think Vanessa Bryant does that?
6.) You've been dating a month: This has nothing to do with you or Khloe in particular, Lamar. This is just a blanket statement to couples everywhere. If you propose after a month, you're asking for trouble. Is a month even long enough to get into an argument? How's that gonna go? A month? Neither of you are even 30 yet, what's the rush? A month? Come on, man. Cook that bird slow; don't throw it in the microwave.
That's all I have for now. I could probably come up with ten more, but the nice guy in me (yeah, he's down there somewhere, I promise) won't allow me to do so. So, Lamar, please take what I've said under advisement and consider your future. I'm not saying she's not wifey material (actually, I am), but I just think you have a few things to work out before throwing the ring on her finger.
Be smart, man; alimony is forever.
~~ Lank
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